How you differ online from IRL

Martin

A monoid in the category of endofunctors
is a Smogon Discord Contributoris a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Community Contributor Alumnusis a Contributor Alumnus
Me and Sobi were talking on Discord a few hours ago and he asked me "are you different irl than online?"

This is actually a really good question, because it got me thinking about how different people treat the anonymity and other differences between the internet and the real world. Obviously there are going to be differences, but I'm kinda interested to know about different people.

Personally I think I probably change less than a lot of people do. Like, I'm slightly more confident than normal but I retain my standard IRL values and am about as chatty as I am irl (granted it's slightly easier to start a conversation on discord or whatever). I tend to shy away from being mean to people online if I can, granted I do occasionally, but I know there are a lot of people who are definitely meaner online than they are IRL, and I also try to keep away from internet culture because my attitude to them is heavily influenced by my attitude towards the same stuff IRL.

What about other people? I'm genuinely very interested in the types of responses I'll see.
 

Kink

it's a thug life ¨̮
is a Tutor Alumnusis a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Community Contributor Alumnusis a Top Tiering Contributor Alumnusis a Contributor Alumnus
Interesting discussion, and good to get to know you Martin. I'm generally a lot more lighthearted in the real world. Sometimes people will see spurts of that in pms or PS chats. Smogon helps me retain the skills I've learned and used in philosophy and, more recently, mediation/negotiation so I really appreciate the opportunity to flex those mental muscles. However I'll still sound like myself, because I tend to type the way I speak.

As for confidence? I'm in no short supply but I am a huge advocate towards being compassionate with people in the real world and I always try to do my best to be polite and sincere in my interactions with people (which is kinda my job as a mediator and financial consultant). My biggest issue over the last 5 years (including some issues on smogon) has been to channel my previous "nervous excited" energy into things that were more productive. I used to party way too hardy, and get really over-emotional about things. Now I'm glad it's all over, and my personally has shifted as a result. That being said, I'm a complete and utter goofball. Few things are better than cottage weekends with friends and occasionally doing fun things/taking trips (when time permits). I love making animated snaps (used to be into stage acting a couple years back) and such, and I still retain glimmers of my extroverted personality, but I've definitely become more introspective and able to take a good step back from the former exciting chaos of my life and, for lack of better words, chill the fuck out and do my best. Ironically, the only way I was able to write any decent music worth recording was after I stopped being a shithead.

But yeah, smogon actually really helped nurture that mentality, so it's hard to see differences in my personality from the real world when so much has come from wanting to be a good leader and learning from my mistakes (sincere thank you to those that have put up with them n_n).
 
Last edited:
Even though I enjoy being polite to fellow users on Smogon, I have a short temper in the real world. I'm not particularly spiteful toward people (why should I be?), but I need more time to learn from my real-life mistakes than those made on here. I just have a short temper offline due to having to deal with my parents. This anger doesn't apply as much in public spaces, such as my current school setting. It's much easier for me to communicate in writing than speech as well, since I don't necessarily have to respond to everything I see on here. I guess Smogon has helped my real-life personality much more than I would have ever expected, though. I still need to work on my temper in my own residence, though.
 

Cresselia~~

Junichi Masuda likes this!!
I'm really quiet in real life.
I rarely disagree with people, and people rarely disagree with me too.
I also rarely talk about extreme views in real life.
 
Toned down version of my internet self. I think it's like that for most people.

Sometimes with an internet community you change posting style and mannerisms, but other than that I have the same personality traits/flaws as I have IRL - snarky, not so good at holding a conversation. Online it's easier to crank up the snark - you're not ruining anyone's mood. Probably.
 
I think that a lot of people like to confide in me while I am online. Which I like and is a good thing I think. Helping people through things is something that I have always been good at because I am good at reading people. IRL I think that people tell me less, I am not sure the reason because I consider myself a good friend and definitely try to be, I guess it might be because I tend to be rather goofy and joke around that people might not think that I can hold a serious conversation, which is actually quite the contrary, I enjoy serious conversations, they are nice to have. I also enjoy heated discussions, as I am very good at them.

I also am very good at holding my opinions about things separate from my opinions about the people themselves. I won't get into it too deeply now, but this November was really hard for some people, well, a lot of people, and I just feel that political views, or how you feel in a particular voting situation does not attest to a person's complete character. Now, I do get that sometimes it does, but if you know someone for so long or a good enough time to get a good idea about someone, you know who they are, and are going to be friends with them or not be friends with them.
 
Well online I'm almost never afraid to talk about the things I want to talk about in part because I'm in a niche community but also because I know people who don't give a fuck can just not talk to me.

Overall I guess I feel like most people probably do when they're at a bar. It's just a way to knock around.
 
I think that a lot of people like to confide in me while I am online. Which I like and is a good thing I think. Helping people through things is something that I have always been good at because I am good at reading people. IRL I think that people tell me less, I am not sure the reason because I consider myself a good friend and definitely try to be, I guess it might be because I tend to be rather goofy and joke around that people might not think that I can hold a serious conversation, which is actually quite the contrary, I enjoy serious conversations, they are nice to have. I also enjoy heated discussions, as I am very good at them.

I also am very good at holding my opinions about things separate from my opinions about the people themselves. I won't get into it too deeply now, but this November was really hard for some people, well, a lot of people, and I just feel that political views, or how you feel in a particular voting situation does not attest to a person's complete character. Now, I do get that sometimes it does, but if you know someone for so long or a good enough time to get a good idea about someone, you know who they are, and are going to be friends with them or not be friends with them.
I'm feel like I'm pretty much the same - related a lot to your first paragraph especially. I think it's easier to become someone people trust on the internet because you have the opportunity to craft your own persona - to be serious, or to indulge in the silly/snarky shit as much as you think fits the situation, whereas in real life you can't change your personality or how you act with people you actually know.
 

ant

⭐️⭐️⭐️
is a Site Content Manager Alumnusis a Battle Simulator Admin Alumnusis a Senior Staff Member Alumnusis a Contributor Alumnusis a Top Smogon Media Contributor Alumnus
Pretty much the same. When I first meet someone I'm a little be shy, either online or irl, mainly because I have a lot of trust issues. People say I'm really sweet at first glance, but when you get to know me better, I'm the sarcastic kind of type who loves joking around but the characteristics that people use to describe me at first remain intact. I'd like to say I'm a fairly nice and approachable person
 

Martin

A monoid in the category of endofunctors
is a Smogon Discord Contributoris a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Community Contributor Alumnusis a Contributor Alumnus
I guess the one thing I forgot to say about myself in the OP is that I say a *lot* more sexual stuff online than I do irl. I feel like I come across as a perv when playing things like Everyone is John on Discord when honestly I'm not actually that interested in the concept of sex so much as just thinking of easy ways of getting people to crack up with minimal effort on my end to make up for the fact that my sense of humor irl is dry and not well-suited for internet groups.
 
I guess the one thing I forgot to say about myself in the OP is that I say a *lot* more sexual stuff online than I do irl. I feel like I come across as a perv when playing things like Everyone is John on Discord when honestly I'm not actually that interested in the concept of sex so much as just thinking of easy ways of getting people to crack up with minimal effort on my end to make up for the fact that my sense of humor irl is dry and not well-suited for internet groups.
You have it easy with your posh accent, all you have to do is dry humor
 
My humor is exactly the same as it primarily consists of "inappropriate" jokes, but otherwise I'm probably just less of a dick and more approachable.
 

Camden

Hey, it's me!
is a Battle Simulator Admin Alumnusis a Social Media Contributor Alumnusis a Senior Staff Member Alumnusis a Community Contributor Alumnusis a Tiering Contributor Alumnus
I am the exact same online as I am offline. I'm typically very outgoing but sometimes I go quiet because I run out of coherent things to say.
 
my humor's a lot more deadpan in real life than it is on the internet

other than that, i'm a lot wordier online, but otherwise, i think i'm about the same in person as i am online
 
I'm... kind of bitter in RL. But then again, I live somewhere that may turn into a future slum. Oh, and I can speak easier here, for some reason. Maybe anonimity (is that even a word?) is a good thing for me.
 
irl I'm still p hotheaded, but im way more selective about who I talk to and interact with. I also brag less and am much more open to others' venting. I also get people out of their comfort zones and do much weirder stuffs.
 
I'm socially awkward as hell irl when it comes to formalities and stuff like that but otherwise I'm basically like the exact same person online as IRL. Obviously in real life I know people better so I usually know their boundaries or sense of humor better, which causes me to act slightly differently.
 

shaian

you love to see it
is a Tutor Alumnusis a Team Rater Alumnusis a Social Media Contributor Alumnusis a Tiering Contributor Alumnusis a Contributor Alumnus
i say the word nigga a lot less to people i'm not close to irl (as in, i dont say it to people i dont know) than i do online and that's about it.
 
I do strive to be honest both online and in person, so I don't think I'm all that different. The way I write can differ to the way I speak, I suppose because I can read over what I'm writing and have more time to think than if I was giving someone an answer straight out. That way my ability to use the wrong words (something I've dubbed 'speakos') comes across a lot less. It only really comes across when I'm writing if I'm trying to be funny, where I may accidentally think a silly word instead of the normal one and use it as a form of entertainment lol. It's something that happens more irl when I'm tired or hyper. I also tend to think in metaphors, but I can be a lot more descriptive with my writing than I can voiced words. Again I guess it's because I have more time to think things through.
 

Users Who Are Viewing This Thread (Users: 1, Guests: 0)

Top