Serious LGBTQ

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Lina

Out of the Woods
is a Battle Simulator Moderator Alumnus
Hey so recently in Australia, the results of our same sex marriage survey were announced. 62% of voters were in favour of changing the laws!! This is a huge result and a step in the right direction towards marriage equality here in Australia. It's not legalised yet, but is currently being debated in the Australian Senate and is on track to be legalised by Christmas. I'm so proud of my country and so happy for everyone.
Australia now has same sex marriage! It's been legalised today! Woohoo!
 

Stellar

of the Distant Past
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I don’t have a long story to accompany this post because I’ve never felt super conflicted or anything, but I’ve now come out to all family, friends, and coworkers (the ones I interact with). Everyone seems fine with my being gay and are supportive of me.

I’m currently seeing a guy and we are headed to Disney this weekend. :)

P.S. gay senior staff conspiracy yaddayadda
 

Empress

33% coffee / 33% alcohol / 34% estrogen
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Hahaha. Way to leave out every bit of context. That's a huge insult to us.

When people like Ben Shapiro and Milo, among others, use their platforms to bully LGBT+ people under the guise of "free speech", we hear crickets from people like you. When people give JT Brown (black hockey player) death threats for peacefully protesting, we hear crickets from people like you. And when this happened, we got, "SJWs are murderers! The LGBT+ community wants everyone to conform to their views and exterminate you if you don't! This is another attack on free speech from the tolerant left!"

When an LGBT+ person expresses disgust about being bullied, the right simultaneously labels them as a triggered bluepilled libtard SJW snowflake cuck who needs a safe space and a dangerous terrorist hell-bent on destroying free speech. Because the targeted person is just way too sensitive about being politically incorrect, as is the standard for the entitled generation, apparently. Then Ames kills herself, and because it fits your narrative, all of a sudden, bullying is suddenly bad?

Bullying is not a partisan issue, no matter how much the right tries to make it seem. It doesn't matter who it's coming from; it should not happen, and there must be better efforts to stop it. Indeed, one of Ames's colleagues (Jaxton Wheeler) did send her a death threat. That's completely unacceptable, and he should be permanently out of a job for it. Conversely, another one of Ames's colleagues (Aspen Brooks) simply explained that she accepted Ames's views despite not agreeing with them. Although Brooks said that in a completely non-aggressive way, the following morning, she faced death threats herself. Brooks did absolutely nothing wrong, and people are doing to her what was done to Ames, only this time it's apparently acceptable. Conversely, the people who disagreed with Ames's viewpoints still seem very shocked at what transpired and are outraged at the bullying that took place (myself included). The double standards and hypocrisy are outrageous. I rest my case.

(just had to fix a minor grammar mistake; hope I don't get fired from GP for it lol)
 
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Empress

33% coffee / 33% alcohol / 34% estrogen
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Hahaha. Way to leave out every bit of context. That's a huge insult to us.

When people like Ben Shapiro and Milo, among others, use their platforms to bully LGBT+ people under the guise of "free speech", we hear crickets from people like you. When people give JT Brown (black hockey player) death threats for peacefully protesting, we hear crickets from people like you. And when this happened, we got, "SJWs are murderers! The LGBT+ community wants everyone to conform to their views and exterminate you if you don't! This is another attack on free speech from the tolerant left!"

When an LGBT+ person expresses disgust about being bullied, the right simultaneously labels them as a triggered bluepilled libtard SJW snowflake cuck who needs a safe space and a dangerous terrorist hell-bent on destroying free speech. Because the targeted person is just way too sensitive about being politically incorrect, as is the standard for the entitled generation, apparently. Then Ames kills herself, and because it fits your narrative, all of a sudden, bullying is suddenly bad?

Bullying is not a partisan issue, no matter how much the right tries to make it seem. It doesn't matter who it's coming from; it should not happen, and there must be better efforts to stop it. Indeed, one of Ames's colleagues (Jaxton Wheeler) did send her a death threat. That's completely unacceptable, and he should be permanently out of a job for it. Conversely, another one of Ames's colleagues (Aspen Brooks) simply explained that she accepted Ames's views despite not agreeing with them. Although Brooks said that in a completely non-aggressive way, the following morning, she faced death threats herself. Brooks did absolutely nothing wrong, and people are doing to her what was done to Ames, only this time it's apparently acceptable. Conversely, the people who disagreed with Ames's viewpoints still seem very shocked at what transpired and are outraged at the bullying that took place (myself included). The double standards and hypocrisy are outrageous. I rest my case.

(just had to fix a minor grammar mistake; hope I don't get fired from GP for it lol)
So a few hours later, apparently Brooks had to delete all of her social media pages b/c somebody threatened that he would kill her when she gets discharged from the hospital; she had her tonsils out, and the guy who made the threat knows where the hospital is. And once again, crickets.

I also failed to notice that some outrage was directed at Brooks telling Ames to "suck [her] dick" or something like that, but that's hardly bullying. Ames getting mad at that is the same thing that the right loves to attack "SJW"s for. Now a song to mark the occasion:

 
23 and fucking afraid of coming out to my friends/relatives.

specially friends. im mostly really close to a lot of straight guys (most of them are co-workers) and im super scared of them cutting me off if i eventually do come out to them, specially one of my closest co-workers, who i absolutely fucking love as a friend (i dont even like the guy romatically speaking). ive been wanting to come out to my family and friends but the constant fear of isolation/rejection has been stopping me from doing so, and the fact that i live in a city in which being gay isnt really common and theres still constant homophobia through and through doesnt help either. *sigh*
 

Soul Fly

IMMA TEACH YOU WHAT SPLASHIN' MEANS
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A lot of the homophobia is bro culture banter. If you hear a lot of casual gay jokes then that's were that stems from rather than any properly channelled malice behind it. I do not know what your dynamic with your friends/workers is like, but I know my circle toned down on that end a lot after a close friend of ours came out. We cared enough to change the way we behaved and are still great fucking friends. Glad he gave us the chance.

Maybe try talking about it with people whose judgement you trust if you feel uncomfortable coming out to your larger circle atm.
 

Bughouse

Like ships in the night, you're passing me by
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mean girls was on tv so i was like hell yea and then i was watching the scene where janis is like “he’s too gay to function” and they censored it to make it it “he’s too BLEEP to function”

merry crisis
more importantly mean girls the musical is a tragesty
 
Im really inspired by the responses and stories here. Im a 25 yr old closeted bisexual. I haven't had the courage to come out for a variety of reasons. My parents and i have a exceptionally volatile relationship, stemming from my rape as a young boy. They accused me of sinning and essentially disowned me. Im actually afraid of my father's reaction if i were to come out; even though we no longer live together, i do fear for my safety. My friends would no doubt disown me as well, but holding my sexuality in is killing me. I feel like im living a lie every day. But here, I've found a community that seems to be accepting of people like me; that's rare on online gaming sites. I feel like i can be honest with myself here. Maybe that's the first step. Maybe i'll be able to gain the courage at some point.
 
There's a fair amount of layers to it and Oglemi covers a good part of how it's online harassment that's a problem but it's such a weird beast when it's just "Someone says shitty thing in a very public space thousands of people hear about it and express frustration and anger at the person for said shitty thing all at once." I'm sure a great many people went over the line in expressing their anger and frustration but are they not justified to be angry about something like that? Are people supposed to just roll over and be like "yes this is all very fine" when people say homophobic shit. Keep in mind for these people this isn't an isolated event for them, this is one statement in a long line of daily sometimes hourly statements about how x random person thinks something horrible about them for literally no reason. That said, for August it could very well be an isolated homophobic thing and it wasn't as bad as all that, and she didn't deserve to be exposed to the volume of anger and backlash. So in this situation what do you do? Who is to blame? Honestly the solution isn't in the behaviors and attitudes needing fixing it's a problem inherent to the platform of social media. It's hard to reconcile that a public conversation amongst a small following of people who like could be shown to thousands of people who may not at all like you or what you have to say in the slightest. Maybe there's a solution to have where twitter can filter out a high volume of responses from people who don't follow you so that something like this doesn't happen anymore (but twitter has been very reticent to implement anything of the sort and thus their harassment problem continues to grow and fester).
No, they really aren't justified. It was August Ame's own choice who she would and would not sleep with. Are you saying she should be forced to sleep with someone whom she doesn't want to? Is this what it has come down to? A persons preferences makes them a homophobe/racist/etc?
 
Outlaw - that's such an obtuse outlook. a lot of behaviors are informed by racist/homophobic/fatphobic/transphobic etc. systems. no one is holding a gun to your head and forcing you to sleep anyone. people are however allowed to critique and make known these very behaviors and dominant ideologies because, hey, they're shitty!! if you 'prefer' dating white people, that's your prerogative - but you can't think that these preferences are isolated from hegemonic cultural norms.
 

Scholar

Shinjiro's babe
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Yeah I'm Bi and afraid to come out to my family because I know my family won't accept it since they are Christian and against anything LGBTQ. ;-;
 

Posho

local gaymer weeb
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Yeah I'm Bi and afraid to come out to my family because I know my family won't accept it since they are Christian and against anything LGBTQ. ;-;
I think the best way to cope with that is to try and have your family approaching the subject a bit, being kind of opportunistic, and have them know that there is nothing wrong with people feeling attracted to their same gender, without insisting too much if you don't want them to find that out yet. That is just my advice though and what I would do if I were you, but you have to follow your gut and do what you think is best for you :)

Feel free to share any of your concerns , people here are pretty welcoming and supportive n.n
 

yogi

I did not succumb...
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Yeah I'm Bi and afraid to come out to my family because I know my family won't accept it since they are Christian and against anything LGBTQ. ;-;
I am lucky that even though I am part of a Christian family that they're okay with me being Bi, bar my Grandfather who I still haven't properly come out to yet. I've been slowly coming out to more people and it's been a struggle because people have judged me. I really hope that your family stop being as narrow-minded and accept you for who you are.
 
Outlaw - that's such an obtuse outlook. a lot of behaviors are informed by racist/homophobic/fatphobic/transphobic etc. systems. no one is holding a gun to your head and forcing you to sleep anyone. people are however allowed to critique and make known these very behaviors and dominant ideologies because, hey, they're shitty!! if you 'prefer' dating white people, that's your prerogative - but you can't think that these preferences are isolated from hegemonic cultural norms.
You know what's -really- shitty? Harassing a person into committing suicide for having a preference that literally affected no one but herself and thinking it's justified.

Attraction isn't controllable. What one finds pretty is rarely going to be the same for all. People have types, they have preferences, they're attracted to whatever is their fancy and they aren't racist/homophic/fatphobic/transphobic/whateverphobic for having them. It's just what they like.
 
23 and fucking afraid of coming out to my friends/relatives.

specially friends. im mostly really close to a lot of straight guys (most of them are co-workers) and im super scared of them cutting me off if i eventually do come out to them, specially one of my closest co-workers, who i absolutely fucking love as a friend (i dont even like the guy romatically speaking). ive been wanting to come out to my family and friends but the constant fear of isolation/rejection has been stopping me from doing so, and the fact that i live in a city in which being gay isnt really common and theres still constant homophobia through and through doesnt help either. *sigh*
update

decided to come out to my closest co-worker today, since hes the one i trust the most at the moment. super positive response, didnt give a fuck about who i was, and the first time in my life that i truly saw that somebody cared for me in the slightest.

after the response, i decided to come out to my dad who was the one who i had hoped would accepted. the response was shitty. basically told me to not tell anybody because my family isnt ready for this shock, said he was super porud of me in a tone that suggested he was actually not very proud of me and i could tell he was super frustrated. so basically this fucked our relationship, even though it might not seem like it now.

i was planning on telling one other friend tomorrow but after that response i dont know what the fuck to do.
 
okay so, i'm not trying to be bigoted at ALL, okay? i just think we really need to rethink some things about this whole children gender autonomy argument. so like, i totally support the rights of children to identify with their assigned gender, but i don't think it's something to rush into!! if a child with a vagina is like, yea, you got it, i'm a girl, cool! but how can we trust them? they're only children, after all. we need some serious controls put in place for these decisions, because i'm worried it's becoming the 'edgy' thing to do to have cis kids. i hope you parents all realize that puberty is permanent, you know? you don't have to be another cis-horror story.
 

ehT

:dog:
is a Contributor Alumnus
I wrote a thing.
Love, both as a concept and as an experience, has always been elusive to me. And as a trans woman who's only figured herself out this past year or so, I've really only started to understand it now. I spent the first 20 years of my life always a couple steps removed from reality, like I lived in a fishbowl, watching life happen to someone else. I couldn't comprehend love because I only ever imagined it happening to this grotesque facsimile of a person I had to parade around every day and pass off as human. Falling in love with that would've been like falling in love with a scarecrow.

I'm not sure about having to be taught love, but I sure do understand mistaking love for something else. I managed to find love during that time, but I only know that through hindsight. Even though she pierced the veil of my delusions and gave life to my starving soul, I could only understand it through the lens of who I thought I was, a gay guy. Obviously, that was all she could see, too. No one had any reason to believe otherwise (If I were to explain how I figured out I wasn't a gay guy but a gay girl we'd be here all day). Neither of us knew what we felt, because ironically, we thought seeing each other as anything more than friends would be a betrayal of who I was.

All of this was years ago, and we've long since moved on, but I think a lot about what would've become of us if I was somehow ready to face my true self then, if only because it's my one frame of reference for what love is like. That confused, angsty, codependent mess of a... friendship, I'll call it... is my only real insight into what it'd be like to experience love as the woman I am now. I'm far more mature now than I was then—I've learned a bit about self-care, I know the definition of the word "boundaries", and I have a bit more self-respect—but I still can't comprehend what it'd be like to have lasting, intimate, romantic love be part of my everyday life, to have that life-giving presence simply be part of the scenery. It's only ever been fleeting.

I know the touch of another woman's soul would help soothe many of the gaping wounds in my own, but past that, I don't think about it. I think more about what it'd be like to love me, an anxious, terrified debbie downer who isn't so much engaged in life as she is invested in things getting good later down the line. I worry about whether or not it's fair to let someone love me in my current state. It sounds draining. Love is patient, but I have so many issues to sort through between now and when I'm my healthiest, most ideal self that I think it'd honestly be cruel of me to go into a relationship with that much baggage.
I don't know.
It sure as shit would help, though.
 
Zentrius you dont have to force it, just wait for the right time to say it and play it cool, theres no reason to be tragic.. if you say it like if you were confessing something bad, you are predisposing their bad reaction
dw about your parents you are not alone (my mom's reaction was a fucking disaster lmao) they will accept you with time, just act normal, be yourself, be genuine, this is ur only life and it would be a pitty if u lived it without love, there will always be people judging u, life itself is full of dissapointments but its on u to not let it affect u
 
Hello everyone! I'm a lurker on this forum for a few years now and I've read a large amount of the messages in this thread, and I must say that some stories here really helped me in my life. That's why I wanted to share my current situation.

I'm a male high school student and I found out that I'm gay like 2 years ago. I was a really introvert guy back then (I still am) and I cared a lot about what people thought. When I was in the process of accepting myself, my class was filled with bullies who used the word 'gay' a lot in a bad way. This made accepting myself really hard and I started dating a girl just to try to stop thinking that I'm gay. Of course this didn't work out at all and beside breaking a girl's heart, nothing changed.

The process of accepting myself isn't 100% over as sometimes I still think it's going to influence my live in a bad way. But generally I'm pretty happy with how life's going. I recently came out to some friends and my mom, with only positive reactions. However, it feels like I'm stuck at this point.

Before coming out to the rest aka being open to anyone about being gay, I feel like I have to accept myself for 100%. The only problem is that I have no idea how. I think having a serious relationship with a guy could really help, but I don't know any gay guys in my area which makes it feel impossible to get a boyfriend here. But what other option do I have? Dating online?

Like I already said, I have no clue what to do now. If anyone has experienced something similar, I would love to hear your story.
 
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