Finals Smogon Premier League VII - Finals [Won by the Stark Sharks]

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Mr.378

The Iron Man of Ubers
is a Tiering Contributor Alumnus
Good job Sharks. I expected you guys to take it and you didn't disappoint. While I'm disappointed I couldn't play in it watching this spl was still fun and hopefully next year will be better.
 
ggs i suppose. rly haxy series but we def didnt deserve to win tbh too many misplays and such that im not gonna get into because i would just go insane. w/e ppl are human stuff happens i dont rly care.
thats my last team tournament so "was fun" i suppose except not rly cuz it sucked. ye im not playin official tours anymore.
"Bye-bye" -Kyou Fujibayashi.
 
I think this is what Shake meant to say....

Well, now I know what it feels like to be left at the altar. And with my luck, and at this rate, that will happen too.
I normally try to not complain about hax and accept defeat graciously, but this finals round was complete and utter bullshit. The Sharks are the most undeserving trophy winners ever, not a single person on that roster deserves a trophy for this SPL season. The Classiest were a better team and outplayed the Sharks and somehow managed to lose by conditions we had no control over. If ever a winner deserved to have an asterisk by their names, this would be it.

No, this wasn't any sort of cosmic balance, karma, or whatever you want to call it, not that I believe in those anyway. If those did exist, we would have won. This was nothing short of highway robbery that allowed an unworthy team filled with unworthy players and personnel to get (notice how I didn't say "win" or "earn") a trophy. No, it wasn't "meant to be", because nothing happens because it's supposed to. The Sharks first five "wins" came down to (in order): a freeze, a 50/50, an overheat miss, a freeze, and a choke. Not a single convincing win in the bunch. Not a single instance of being out-teamed or out-played. The Sharks might get the trophy, but it is definitely not deserved, as deserve had nothing to do with this. The Classiest were better. The Classiest are better. The Classiest know this, and anyone who paid any attention to this series would know that, hell the Sharks probably know that. It is nothing but a meaningless trophy.

This is all before we even get into all the shady under the table dealings the Sharks pulled, while showing no loyalty to any of their players. I don't know if I should be more pissed at the people behind the trade or the people that allowed it to happen. But hey, at least CTC gets to keep his SPL trophy without playing a single playoff game. And yeah, let's reward constant asshole behavior from the Sharks, from the top to the bottom of the organization. Speaking of which... look at Golden Sun, thinking this trophy makes any sort of a difference, acting like it allows him to act like even more of an asshole than usual. You are still just the same player as before this all started, a player that has never accomplished anything. And if you did ghost any of those finals matches? You should be embarrassed if that is the best you could do. You and I both know just how much you lucked out here, no matter how you try to justify it to yourself. Funny thing though, if we won I was going to make a post bashing every single one of the Sharks players, and it would have been a hell of a lot better than your weak ass post.

I have no idea how a team can be bailed out by such improbable last minute luck time and time again. I guess the saying is true, "No one wins, one side just loses more slowly." This wasn't just "hax is part of the game" or "those are the breaks" kinds of hax, it was literally "no fucking way that could possibly have just happened" hax, in every important turn of every game. Hell, it was so improbable Smogon promptly shut down for a week afterwards rather than process it (and I should've followed suit...). The Sharks have to tell me, what demon did you sell your soul to for this? Because I obviously sold mine to the wrong one. I guess it isn't true that the devil you know is better than the one you don't...

To the Classiest, now. First, thank you to all of our fans and everyone who supported us and helped us out throughout the regular season and the playoffs. To the players and management: we had a good run, I'm sorry it had to end that way. Back to back finals appearances is still plenty impressive. You all individually exceeded my expectations, you guys won, rose to the occasion, and had my back whenever I needed you guys to. I'm proud of every one of you, and you are all champions in my book, for whatever that is worth.

But fuck the Sharks, and fuck this game, I'm through with it.
 

makiri

My vast and supreme will shall be done!
is a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Smogon Discord Contributor Alumnusis a Contributor Alumnusis a Battle Simulator Moderator Alumnusis a Three-Time Past SPL Championis a Two-Time Past WCoP Champion
Since some fuccbois can't chill and want this now. I wrote this shit before Cased even played that's how confident I was in the final games. I believe in my dudes and as I told them all after the draft, anything but a victory with this squad would be a disappointment.

We did it again boys! Theme music

After one of the worst SPLs last year it is surreal that we managed to get to this point and win it again. For some of the players this is your first and I want to welcome you to the Sharks winning ways. For those of you who have won it before with or without the Sharks, we're here again. It blows my mind that we managed to come together like this and form one of my favorite SPL teams and end it with a win. SPL 2, 5, and now 7 the Sharks are definitely the best SPL team and we couldn't have done it without the players.

Conflict (2,5,7) - The original Shark and one of the best if not the best SPL player ever. I don't know how SPL would be without you, despite saying you cost too much, I think you bring too much to the team and seeing you somewhere else would be like seeing Michael Jordan in a Wizards uniform. You belong with the Sharks until you retire (which should've happened after SPL2 like you said).

Meru (7) - Despite the rough as hell start where I actually talked to Mdragon about benching you, you put that behind you and started winning and you won a lot of our important games to secure victories. Glad I never benched you.

blarajan (7) - Signing you to play something other than LC last year was weird as hell, but it allowed us to keep you this year and despite the rough start you ended up near the top of LC again. Despite the rude things I say to you I think you're a cool dude and hope to see you on the Jets and maybe Worlds this year.

reiku (7) - What a beast. I thought you had a great chance of going undefeated but that sub out seemed to kill your momentum, but you still secured a ton of wins for our "bad" ORAS OU. What was a bunch of question marks turned into a solid source of wins.

The Chaser (7) - It feels really weird having you on the team. You were part of our rival Ruiners for so long it was like adding our worst enemy. I also found it kind of crazy that you beat MoP in the finals as a sort of revenge for taking away your perfect season back in SPL2. Glad we took the chance on you because you definitely were a good source of wins.

TheFourthChaser (5,7) - I actually forgot you were on the SPL5 team until I looked it up just now. I'm glad you had a bad year last year because it meant we could get you for super cheap and it made a lot of people sleep on you. Too bad you still suck.

GOD MARTH (7) - Like Meru I think there were one or two times we needed a win from you and you pulled it out like a GOD. I'm glad we picked you up cause sometimes you just need that swagger and without you I think we would be sorely lacking.

Golden Sun (7) - I've always wanted you on the Sharks and we finally made it happen this year. You may not have had the best year but I'm glad you were here and able to get us wins. Always great to have more OCN players.

Hikari (7) - Definitely one of the best trades we ever made was for you and we have a history of really good trades. You were like a third manager at times and kept a lot of these jokers in check. 3 straight finals in a row is pretty crazy too, glad we got you one of the trophies after denying you 2 years ago. I'm still jerking myself off after that final game, never seen something like that in the last match of a tournament. Where you going boy?

Smurf (2,7) - So weird that a random PM the day before SPL2 draft turned into a trophies with you. It was really great to have you back. Your game vs VIL was pretty sick and made bringing you back worth it just for that.

Steve Angello (7) - Another dude we really wanted a few times and we finally got you on the Sharks. Part of our "bad" ORAS OU it was great having you for sure. Always optimistic and ready to cheer on everyone.

Cased (7) - Garbage player and a pain in the ass. That said it was great talking with you and I'll probably always stay stressed out of your stupid ass team choices. No idea how you won that final game either, I looked away and then suddenly all of his mons were dead. I'm not going to spoil it by looking at a log, the mystery is enough.

Kevin Garrett (5,7) - Still weird that despite our history we got together twice now to win a trophy. You've been on the Sharks longer than players that are only identified as Sharks. Hopefully when you go into the hall of fame you're wearing a Sharks jersey. Always glad to have you on board.

Gene (7) - Too busy jerking it to play more than 3 games.

Alastar Law (7) - You got us 2 important wins and helped out our ORAS players a lot. Really glad to have you on the Sharks.

CTC (7) - A lot of our ORAS success was behind the scenes from this guy. With him we went from a weakness to a strength. I think that is more than you can ask for from an accidental buy.

Frizy (7) - We didn't really need you, but once again after years of wanting you we finally had money to get you. You were going to be our super sub but we didn't really need to sub so it all worked out in the end.

MDragon (7) - I asked you on a whim and boy am I glad you accepted to join me. I went from sheer panic about finding an assistant to having the best assistant a manager could ask for. Really glad I could work with you again and get you a Sharks trophy after we failed last year. If I decide to call it quits next year you would definitely be the person I would be most comfortable giving the team to, you just have to keep Conflict somehow.

Thanks to Zeb for hosting again and good games to the Classiest, sorry we killed the repeat but Sharks destiny > all.

Big thanks to all the SPL2 and SPL5 winning teams, and the other teams in between that didn't win. You guys all made SPL fun and exciting. Too bad Pana and MoP were on the other side of this finals :( also fuck anyone who takes Lady Bug from me.

MoP
Eternal
Ala
Lady Bug
Philip7086
DarkLucario
Sixonesix
panamaxis
husk
Sapientia
Carl
Malekith
Heist
Al Alchemist
Atticus
Tsunami
make
Edgar
Arcticblast
LUST
kael
Stellar
SoulWind
Hawkstar
The Wolf
WhiteQueen

This was just like Hamlet, a suspense thriller and we fucking killed it in the end.

Since Lonelyness isn't around anymore, I'm going to pick on Stratos. How come you didn't get drafted bro? Best doubles player my ass, quit ducking and box me at Worlds.
 
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via MoP because he forgot his password again.

I was supposed to go to bed at like 11, or w/e time calloflochie thinks he scheduled a game. But I'm honestly happy for Sharks and Classiests so I decided to waste time writing this and then regreting the lack of sleep later.

blunder - Today at 12:18 AM
man yall are real cool after losin
blunder - Today at 12:18 AM
interestin

This made me think what the best part about winning a team tournament was. I've had so many losses over the years, it's easy for me to over it easily. But it's not like that for everyone. I think the best part about winning a team tournament is being able to get everything off your chest and letting your teammates know why you had so much sexual tension with them while discussing whether or not you should use Toxic or Will-O-Wisp on Heatran.

And since Lady Bug disgusts me so much and he made a farewell post, I figured I'd out do him. I'm sending him to the bench one last time.

This will just simply be a shout out post for the last team I'll ever play with on Smogon.

Agammemnon - I know that you've had a rough latter half of the season and my inclusion was a huge part of that. It's not that anyone thought you were bad, it's just that there was always a difference of opinion at certain things. You know all these things already as I've told them to you. But I just wanted to reiterate to you to just focus on one thing and going with it. Don't let people tell you what moves to make on any turns, as it's hard to learn why things work out the way they did or why they didn't and you end up second-guessing yourself.

Arcticblast - You thought I'd carry you to a second free SPL trophy? LOL guess again, I don't even know half the ORAS Pokemon. I know you lived vicariously through Memoric though so I guess 8-3 is a really sweet record. Honestly people should really look more at Arcticblast. He was absolutely understanding that he had a teammate that was simply on fire. He was probably Memoric's biggest supporter. Well, probably because blunder and soulgazer were too busy on each of Memorics' nuts.

blunder - One of the more enjoyable members on the team, even if he is a flight risk. Did you know this nigga isn't even Canadian? Yeah IDGAF, I'm retired, enjoy sitting next to Anti on the Team Asia bench. But on a real note, if this guy isn't up against Style or WhiteQueen, he'll probably schedule a match with you.

Calloflochie - You're probably still fired up from our most recent loss. Sorry you had class. Sorry you care about your education. Sorry you have aspirations to do stuff with your life. We couldn't catch each other much cause you live in Australia, which I've told you isn't your fault, but I mean, it kind of really is. You just lost out on a great a time. But remember it's just Pokemon dude, don't end up bitter and resentful over things that are beyond your control dude. You know what you can control? Not sending dick picks during our battles.

giara - I'm so, so, so happy you were on the team. You had to take the burden of risking getting into 200+ turn games each week with douche Haze using a holes. The last time I ever touched a GSC game was back in like SPL2. I tried not to step on your toes too often and I wish a few more things went your way, because playing GSC is so under-appreciated, especially without complaint (something that I can't do anymore)!

Evuelf - Honestly, anyone who's overlooking this dude when they find themselves matched up in WCOP against him, congrats, join the club. I still don't know how you keep churning out wins. Every week, we'd do a few tests, and then I go on my way with other tiers. Come back on Saturday to see if I'm allowed to use a gimmick team, and thanks to you I can. I legit believed that SW would win in the Semis but after that win, I knew we had it in the bag. (Thank god for KG and his DDOSSing though).

Heysup - Let's be honest, I avoided the LC chan. I do remember patronizing you and the entirety of the LC community when I was still AOPs in #stark. Half a decade later, there is absolutely no ill will anywhere. And it's not like we just tried to put it aside for the sake of the team or something sensual like that. It just goes to show that if you don't Mons too seriously, you'll have a much better time.

IAmGingy - The last few weeks have been rough. I mean, knowing that your next team tournament is going to be with Problems is like finding out you have prostate cancer. Even though the last few weeks have been rough, thanks for giving us hope in our second ORAS slot. I know the entire world that we'd collapse cause we gave away daftmau5 for nothing, but you gave us a steady ship during the eternal Primordial Sea.

Ice Tea - Our residential test dummy and overall non-Zamrock dummy. I'm legit happy you were able to get in a few games, using whatever random thing you wanted to. I was kind of fearful that you wouldn't get to play and I'd end up playing each and every week just because I was a 'name'. I know you're sad about your record but it doesn't matter in the long run. As long as you don't get Ojama as a captain, your record won't really matter.

Memoric -
http://replay.pokemonshowdown.com/smogtours-doublesou-136834
http://replay.pokemonshowdown.com/smogtours-doublesou-138705
http://replay.pokemonshowdown.com/smogtours-doublesou-141663
http://replay.pokemonshowdown.com/smogtours-doublesou-146031

The evidence of why my vote would've went to Doubles for tiebreaker. And just in case Pana reads this so he'll finally know who you are.

New Breed - I was honestly pretty agitated with how you were with the team. Just showed up each week, grabed a team and played. And it wasn't even as if you were Ojama-leveled skill or Ojama-leveled lucky. But all it took was 1 win, in the Semis to turn it around. That's how easy it is to turn around someone's perception in a team tournament. That's one of the best part of a team tournament. This is more for other random users reading this than it is for you. All it takes sometimes is one week, or one game, and you've totally ridden yourself of an irrelevant stress.

Ojama - Ojama is probably one of the most passionate dudes in the game for someone who has accomplished so much. He's also extremely loyal despite what his reputation might be. I've seriously had nothing against him despite past transgressions ahem SPL 3. This dude's only flaw is that he's too loyal, sticking up for his teammates and friends even if they do need a little benching for a little bit. But yeah, unless you think having friends is cancerous, he's easily a cornerstone on any team tournament.

panamaxis - If I had to have picked any player on Smogon to play like, besides me. And besides husk. And besides Eo Ut Mortus I'm jk. Eo sucks. But yeah you should probably retire too. You're getting far too old (DID YOU KNOW VIL ISNT IN HIS FIFTIES?). Join me in retirement. Awaiting for farewell post too.

soulgazer - Yeah I have nothing to say to you after that finals performance.

Zamrock - I can honestly say Zamrock is one of the best teammate I've ever had in my long time here, even if the mothereffer doesn't know how to keep his mouth shut inside a battle. Seriously, with such an epidemic of Indian people on the site, how do you not believe in karma? This nigga isn't even Mongolian, probably. But does he do anything else you ask him to as long as it's not "please dont talk in your games".

Stark Sharks - I want to congratulate all of you on winning, even the ones I don't know, or hell, even the ones who I don't like. They always get portrayed as a dirty team but they're not. Weird things just sometimes happen, that and some autistic NEET TD is out to get them. As most people know, this is/was basically my team. makiri kept a good tradition of winning going on. Unfortunately blarajan got a trophy, so...I guess everyone else on Asia can stop throwing just to prevent him from getting one. Conflict, gene, M Dragon, KG, etc you guys are already etched in the Smogon HoF, so not much else to say. Cased is objectively the most annoying person on the forums. It's like taking all of WhiteQueen's forum posts, and then attempting to get on a registered sex offender's list, and then typing those words into the chat. Jesus christ. Sharks definitely deserved that trophy for that ordeal.

P.S. GOD MARTH I had nothing to do with your BW game in case you're wondering if I cteam'd you yet again or something. Just luck of the draw sometimes dude. And Evuelf is that good.

soulgazer - Objectively, probably a lite-version of Cased. SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO annoying. But he means well. I think. I mean, half our helpers were like NU players, so some people like him. Probably.

I really want to thank everyone that came and help us out, even if it's just to spam TIMER TIMER TIMER TIMER TIMER. Unless you're Tesung , who screams it out when there's still 270 seconds left on the clock.

You guys all know who you are. This does not include Tesung. You get nothing.

soulgazer - I really like picking on sg. He's probably a cool guy. But honestly, I can't believe FLCL wanted to stay on team Canada to deal with this guy.

Stellar - This guy seriously knows too much for his own good. Did you know he seriously put Smogon Admin 2012-2015 on his resume? I'm jk. But he knows more than you. Seriously. His choice in alts/name changes and choice in friends might be stupid, but he's got a hot sister.

But just to the community in general, just enjoy it. It's fun winning, and it's fun being part of a team. Don't take things too seriously. Tesung surely hasn't since the auction. Make friends during tournaments, try not to over-stress yourself on things beyond your control. Luck happens. It'll be for you and against you. Same with team match-ups. It's fun developing an arch rival, your very own Gary Oak or Earthworm TD decisions. I know it sounds weird for someone who's been part of the community for basically its entire existence, but life isn't about Pokemon. Just spend a couple hours here and there, but don't let it affect your outside life or anything. Learn to take a joke. And then make a better joke off of that joke. And then claim you created that joke. I mean you all do it in Pokemon right?

Anyways, sorry to my team. I just don't have the time or knowledge of current meta to be as effective as I used to be. It's like being a Snorlax. You kind of start out great but as each gen passes you by, you can only do Snorlax things (I didn't think out this analogy.) But yeah, thanks for carrying most weeks, and putting up with Belly Drum shenanigans, and bothering you guys with what color you think certain Pokes are. Hope you all get picked up in other tournaments and end up overpriced.

Except soulgazer. Jk he's like my 3rd favorite teammate behind Zamrock and myself.

Oh last but not least, big shout out to gene, who contributed more to my SPL team than he did to his in building with me for Semis.
 

CTC

Banned deucer.
is a Two-Time Past SPL Championis a Two-Time Past WCoP Champion
Big Chungus Winner
yung danklord won every team tour in the last 2 years is this nigga human?
still yet to be 1 game played, whats a mop to yung broomstictc?
classiest + danklord = trophy, classiest - basedjesus = oklahoma state
the catalyst of victory, the mascot of triumph, the dankest of jesi and the basedest of lords
individual shoutouts will come later, its ME time.


flexxed, ggs fam


BTW blunder and i have scheduled an obligatory ceremonial tiebreak mock game where we both try hard and play for marbles (if i lose grey my trophy and give it to him, if he loses he changes name to ctc is my dad for a month)
#STUNTORDIE
 
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