Social Neurodiversity

bdt2002

Pokémon Ranger: Guardian Signs superfan
is a Pre-Contributor
It’s been a while since I’ve looked back at this thread, and it would seem we have some new people who have discovered this thread exists during my so-called “absence”. I welcome these users into our little community with open arms, and would like to help answer any questions you have as best as I can. I can’t promise I’ll have all the answers, though. :)

In an effort to encourage some discussion to keep this thread alive, I want to leave some discussion questions here for us to ponder. Please note that I’m not asking for anything specific and just want to let you have a chance to enjoy talking to the rest of our community:
  • Have there ever been times when your special interests have helped you through a difficult time related to your diagnos(es)? What lessons did you learn from these?
  • How do you feel your diagnos(es) influence yourself and/or your personality on a daily basis? Are these influences positive or negative?
  • What kinds of things would you want other people to have a better understanding of regarding your diagnos(es) and/or your life situation?
 
It’s been a while since I’ve looked back at this thread, and it would seem we have some new people who have discovered this thread exists during my so-called “absence”. I welcome these users into our little community with open arms, and would like to help answer any questions you have as best as I can. I can’t promise I’ll have all the answers, though. :)

In an effort to encourage some discussion to keep this thread alive, I want to leave some discussion questions here for us to ponder. Please note that I’m not asking for anything specific and just want to let you have a chance to enjoy talking to the rest of our community:
  • Have there ever been times when your special interests have helped you through a difficult time related to your diagnos(es)? What lessons did you learn from these?
  • How do you feel your diagnos(es) influence yourself and/or your personality on a daily basis? Are these influences positive or negative?
  • What kinds of things would you want other people to have a better understanding of regarding your diagnos(es) and/or your life situation?
i have ocd and i wish people would stop being like oh so you're a neat freak? no! im actually a very messy person! i just have these thoughts that i feel horrible about
 
Today I learned that people with OCD aren't all neat freaks
stupid stereotypes
Even when I try not to I still fall for them
I guess in a similar vein, not all Autistic people are incredibly smart
I, for example, am painfully average at most everything I do
 
  • What kinds of things would you want other people to have a better understanding of regarding your diagnos(es) and/or your life situation?
i was diagnosed with autism at age 3, and i seriously wish more people put that into consideration when interacting with me.

i struggle with picking up on social cues. i'm inattentive. i spend so long thinking of things with little-to-no importance. i also have an awful nail-biting habit, but i think its unlikely that's connected to my autism.

the problem is that no one fucking believes me because i'm "normal enough". i'm in classes with regular kids and i do a good job at hiding my autism, so when i do something that doesn't follow the status quo, it makes me look and feel stupid.

the person i clash most with because of this is my dad, because he genuinely can't comprehend the fact that i'm neurodivergent. he outright denies it. him expecting me to be a normal person when i'm not has been emotionally draining since i started middle school.

so yeah, it sucks. but i hope it gets better soon.

i wish this thread was more active, i miss talking to my neurodivergent buddies :c
i'm here :psyglad:
 

bdt2002

Pokémon Ranger: Guardian Signs superfan
is a Pre-Contributor
I think the reason this thread can go silent so often isn’t because we don’t care about each other, because we do. It’s more so because the conversations that would take place here are geared towards neurodiversity itself, rather than being a discussed hub for neurodiverse individuals. I would imagine the reason this thread was designed in the way it was might have had something to do with not wanting neurodiversity to feel like some kind of exclusive club- having an area where just neurodiverse individuals could hang out could quickly create problems beyond just “neurotypical individuals feeling left out”. In an effort to break the stigma, we might actually be making it worse if we ever tried that.

The other reason this thread can feel quiet often is when there’s simply not much to talk about in the neuroscience field that either A. hasn’t already been posted about, or B. hasn’t been major breaking news across the community. This can be taken two equally valid ways- you either save your posts for when the time feels right, or you try and make an effort to break the silence by posting again.
 
When I was a child, I was considered unusual by teachers and doctors, but no diagnosis was made as the timeframe of the early 2000s in my country didn't really know or consider neurodivergency. This has only gotten worse and worse as I've aged, very strong intrusive thoughts and obsessions that occupy my mind for months on end are the result. I used to think I may have autism, but I understand social cues very well and lack most symptoms.

4 and a half years ago, I went to a psychiatrist to get myself diagnosed with depression. Additionally, I was also diagnosed with anxiety and OCD. I never considered OCD for myself, as I am a messy person, but I recently heard that these strong intrusive thoughts can be a symptom of OCD

I want to return to a psychiatrist, get my OCD checked out more closely and talk with therapist about it more. I may consider medication too, however when I tried out antidepressants, they had absolutely no effect on me, just mild side effects, even in high dosage, so it may not work out well for me
 
my second post was about neurodivergency and got deleted :c
Because none of your posts spark discussion. This thread wasn't made for ND people to post "hi im autistic" and then leave. If you read the OP it's about discussing experiences and day to day life as an ND individual. If you are looking for more active discussion with/about ND people you'll want to look for a Discord server because that's not going to happen on a niche forum like this.
 
Because none of your posts spark discussion. This thread wasn't made for ND people to post "hi im autistic" and then leave. If you read the OP it's about discussing experiences and day to day life as an ND individual. If you are looking for more active discussion with/about ND people you'll want to look for a Discord server because that's not going to happen on a niche forum like this.
and i asked a question to spark disscussion!
 

GatoDelFuego

The Antimonymph of the Internet
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Now that the meme has passed

How do people feel about the good doctor

Personally every time I saw clips of it I wanted to punch a wall
 
Now that the meme has passed

How do people feel about the good doctor

Personally every time I saw clips of it I wanted to punch a wall
Like a surgeon
In all seriousness I just never cared much for the show primarily because I didn't watch it
but from what I've seen (I am a surgeon)
not something that looks very autistic representation friendly
 
Just found out this thread exists!

Gonna ramble a bit about some thought and an experience I was having this week relating to the topic, long post incoming

While I'll skip most of the introducton, I'll start off with that I have autism, ADHD and anxiety (former since young age, latter couple only diagnosed in recent years).

The thoughts I was having more specifically related to social interaction and why I find it so confounding. I think the way I can best break it down is this:

Life, at all times, is a series of choices we make. Social interaction is a microcosm of that -- every conversation can go an infinite number of ways, and depending on the situation (work, friends, family) it's more likely to lean toward specific topics. The impression I get from neurotypical folks is that this is generally less of a choice in low stress situations - words come naturally, second thoughts are reserved for moments of tension.

For me though, this state of deciding is a constant. Outside of talking with friends I truly feel shameless around, every single conversation goes as though I have a menu of options to pick and autoscroll is disabled. Easy answers may come quickly, but the command still has to be given from brain to mouth manually. I feel like this is in large part due to conditioning from a young age with speech therapy and general socializing - when I was younger, I would speak at length to everybody and nobody about whatever was on my mind like, for example, pokemon. This strategy may find you likeminded friends, but often leads to a very low turnover rate of genuine acquaintanceship. Thus, talking became a hands-on job, and my hands get tired as hell after a little while.

Compounding this is anxiety, or, as I like to call it, Awareness Paralysis. Not only is manual input required to carry on conversation, but I'm made constantly aware by my subconscious exactly what the worst version of myself would say or do in any given interaction. It's easy to scroll over most of the time, but it gets taxing pretty fast and the feelings of disgust over many of these blink-and-you-miss-it thoughts lingers far longer than healthy or necessary.

I think that's why I've become a much more talkative person since I've joined online spaces. It relieves immediate physical pressure of needing to present as a functional person and always allows a backspace.

I'm back working full-time again though, and those moments where I freeze up over easy questions I instantly knew the answer to were upon me once again. I've more or less come to accept this is just gonna be a natural part of living with the brain I was given, and it's up to me now to give myself some leeway.

When I got home yesterday though, I was failing that last part. I laid in bed for a bit until the thoughts bubbled over and I needed to do something to alleviate the tension in my head. Talking was only gonna add to it, so I sorta just reverted to a basic instinct and made some strange noises. A few gritted exhales, some ooouuuhs, and some head shaking and miscellaneous sounds later, I snapped out of it. I wont argue this is a healthy coping mechanism or that I didn't look very silly doing it, but DAMN it felt good haha

It really does make the times I've had people tell me "wow, I didn't know you had autism" all the stranger to me. The menu options of responses to that one range from "fat fucking cap" to "thanks, I guess" to simply "bruh".

regardless, I type this out as a means of sorting my own thoughts and to ask if anyone else with issues socializing that finds themselves here has any other explanations for how/why they might find it difficult. I find these sorts of analogies/explanations make it much easier to describe not just to
medical personnel but to anyone curious and willing to empathize with plights many of us share.

Thanks to anyone who took the time to read, and have a good one everyone!
 
The more i read about other autistic people's experiences the more I suspect that I might be autistic?
I got diagnosed with ADHD a year ago but that was only after I had a complete breakdown, lol. I really don't know how much of my behavior is because of adhd/other reasons that people tell me I can't be autistic, but the more NT people i talk to the more obvious the disconnect becomes. Socially I think I do okay at knowing what to say and how to respond but it's more of like a "if someone says x, the correct response is y". Also I did have a lot more issues with understanding sarcasm/not everyone being literal when I was younger, but there was a particularly bad incident that happened as a result of me not understanding that when I was younger so I basically just stopped trusting people for a long time.

Also I had a huge interest in theatre for a while, and I did perform in school plays and such. I took my roles (even the small ones) very seriously and I would like to say that I'm a pretty good actor/improvisor and I do apply a lot of the things I learned about performance to daily interactions. I don't know where I'm going with this rambling I just wanted to share I guess :)
 

GatoDelFuego

The Antimonymph of the Internet
is a Site Content Manager Alumnusis a Social Media Contributor Alumnusis a Community Leader Alumnusis a Smogon Discord Contributor Alumnusis a Top Contributor Alumnusis a Top Smogon Media Contributor Alumnus
This clip wasn't even the craziest part of the show. When the meme got popular I got sucked into watching endless clips of it with the main character screaming at a bunch of people and in general just being a huge asshole to everyone they meet. Of course, because of the autism. The comments were always filled with people saying WOW this character is so PRECIOUS ! I feel so bad for them!

reddit said:
i personally don’t like the show, but a friend of mine has many of the same mannerisms as portrayed, which was pretty cool, but we both agreed on one thing about almost all autistic main character representation: there’s no connection to the autistic audience. it’s all to satisfy and try to compensate autistic behaviors and struggles to appeal to neurotypicals to make us seem less ‘alien’ to them. it’s what neurotypicals want autistics to be like, and it never sits right. for once, i don’t want to see a white male, socially awkward autistic genius that’s always depicted
It really does make the times I've had people tell me "wow, I didn't know you had autism" all the stranger to me. The menu options of responses to that one range from "fat fucking cap" to "thanks, I guess" to simply "bruh".
This basically


My corporation hosted a "neurodiversity at work" informational event a couple months ago that I decided to check out. It was a pretty surface level explanation, not surprising, but then explained ways to make the office environment more accepting to neurodiverse individuals. #1 was offer remote office / quiet workspaces (which my company does not really do). When hearing that, a lot of people spoke up that they had gotten letters from their physicians to do this, but their leadership teams were continually fighting them on implementing it. Hard to frame yourself as a neurodivergent-friendly place when you don't actually address said concerns.

When asked why they were attending, around 80% of the people said they thought their kids might be autistic so they wanted to learn more about it. I thought that was pretty interesting.
 

bdt2002

Pokémon Ranger: Guardian Signs superfan
is a Pre-Contributor
Hello again, Neurodiversity thread. Me and two of my college friends the other day had a conversation about ADHD the other day, specifically in regards to another one of our friends. I won't say anything about these people or their personal lives for obvious online safety concerns, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to get the opinions of some of you that actually have been diagnosed with ADHD. The most I feel comfortable with saying is that our other friend has been exhibiting some of the signs that typically preceed a standard ADHD screening (although at this point, what even is standard anymore?), specifically about his attention span and daily routines. From what I've gathered from their conversations, his so-called "special interests" and his hyper-fixations are almost too easy to get mixed up with outright obsessions, although I don't see much from him in person in terms of actual hyper-activity scenes. Anyone have any thoughts so far? There's always a possibility he has/is some other diagnos(es), but like with the rest of this question I want to collect other educated opinions if I can.
 
Certainly massively over-diagnosed. I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was younger, a diagnosis that was long since overturned. Turns out not every kid who doesn't want to listen to some over-educated boomer waffle on for an excruciating hour and then get assigned a 50-part multiple choice assignment about something I could learn just as much about by reading the damn textbook for five minutes has an attention disorder, but tell that to your teachers. I'm not sure it's a uniquely American problem, but American schools are very hostile to kids who don't learn in the traditional lecturing/repetitionary way that they're expected to learn by.

I won't comment on whether or not ADHD exists at all as I'm not remotely qualified to talk about that, but I can speak from experience that a lot of kids who get diagnosed with it are probably misdiagnosed. There are plenty of rational reasons why your kid might have problems paying attention especially in an environment like school that don't require a mental health diagnosis and accompanying medication, and I would be skeptical if my kid recieved such a diagnosis and diligent in ruling out other causes. Maybe listen to your damn kids a little more, that alone would fix a lot of problems right there.
 

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